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[Opinionated columnist Audio Phonicson lets loose on his opinion of headphones.]

I don’t mean to get all mad and stuff, but earphones really make me mad! Where do I start? Well, first of all, when people wear them, it’s like a big sign on their forehead that says: “This is MY music, and I’m shutting myself off from the whole world!” It’s so antisocial and selfish. C’mon people, open up and share your music, just as long as it’s not too loud and it’s not music I don’t like.

And another thing: why do people even listen to music that is so bad? Did they listen to it growing up and the only reason they like it is that their subconscious likes it? People should just take a step back and listen! Man, that stuff is horrible. Really, popular music only stays popular for three weeks because who wants to think about three weeks ago? Not me.

What it comes down to is that music is an art form that has become a source of entertainment, and when you blur that line, I get upset. Sure anybody can listen to any kind of music that sounds like a coughing duck with laryngitis, or a broken jackhammer with holes in the pneumatic air line, but please, if you have to, please, please, wear some earphones for heaven’s sake.